1127 am 'Get This' news

program date: 
Mon, 11/26/2007

11/27/07 Get This

Chris Andreae

 

  1. AWOL:  Missing Army Sergeant Julie Stendahl has returned to Ft. Lewis.  Police, finding her pickup in Lincoln City, considered the circumstances “suspicious.”  (“Suspicious”?  What’s “suspicious” about a sincere attempt to avoid winding up in circumstances that include killing or being killed…)
  2. “Do You Hear What I Hear?”:  The Forest Service is about to actually do a service on behalf of Oregon’s forests.  Specifically, the proposal would ban ATV’s – that’s All Terrain Vehicles – from the woods.  The idea is to reduce sediment damage to streams and harassment of animals.  Much more, of course.  (Admittedly, ATV’s are the loud way to clean up the gene pool but effective nonetheless…)
  3. BARK if you care about wild lands.  Yes, Portland’s own BARK is suing to stop a timber “thinning” project aimed straight at a 500-acre parcel of BLM land near the Molalla River.  For the record, the BLM plans to remove the trees by helicopter.  What a concept…They can take potshots at fleeing ATV enthusiasts…
  4. The Golden Bungee Cord Award goes out to an organization whose acronym, WATCH, derives from World Against Toys Causing Harm represents the biggest stretch seen this year.   But I digress…WATCH wants Oregon parents to avoid giving their children poisonous toys this year.  (If it’s Aqua Dots, you might want to hang onto them until the kids are old enough to attend raves…)  Too obvious to mention;  buy local stuff from local people.
  5. The Golden Goose is Cooked:  The State’s new ethics law is under attack by – whom else? -  Lobbyists.  
  6. And in Washington County two sheriff’s deputies are on paid leave after shooting a man who – naturally – had a gun and was – of course – “suicidal.”  The cops will be reinstated because they are sworn to shoot, aiming for the middle of the target, when confronted by anyone with a gun.  It is, in fact, the law.  So unless you are absolutely certain that you want to top yourself, never confront the police with anything at all in your hand:  No guns, hairbrushes, wallets, lasers, tasers, sticks or dicks…. because they are under standing orders to shoot you “in the middle.”
  7. Bush’s Middle East Summit in Annapolis is on its way to the dump, even as I am writing this.  The administration’s idea of “diplomacy” is, put simply:  “We tell the leaders of t he other nations what we want them to do and if they don’t like it we retaliate.”  That’s it.  That’s all there is.  Being an American “diplomat” these days takes less intelligence and human decency than greeting people at Wal-Mart….
  8. This came down yesterday, but in case you missed thee full-throttle implication:  The Bush administration announced that al-Maliki’s government wants the US to be a permanent presence in Iraq.  (Well somebody’s got to occupy the new $60 million dollar embassy and man those 14 military bases…)  The idea is that the US military is going to kick the UN out – they don’t want the job anyway – and move in so that there won’t be any nasty violence or coups – financial or otherwise, though I suspect financial.  Basically, America is going to be protecting Iraq’s oil from the rest of the world, including Iraqis, for the foreseeable future…
  9. Cheney had a fibrillation ‘event.’  I’m just saying…
  10. Trent Lott and Dennis Hastert have Left The Building.
  11. Base Hit:  The Republican Party is going after its “base”, the stratospherically wealthy, because ordinary fund-raising is not working well this time around.  The GOP wants its sugar daddies to put up the cash to back its Chosen.  (Wait, aren’t we supposed to have some sort of campaign finance laws that limit individual campaign donations?  Something like that?)
  12. Prosecutors say that Oscar Wyatt is anything but “reformed” and is therefore going to serve out the maximum sentence for his central role in the UN oil-for-food scandal.  Wyatt is the god-fearing Texas oilman who got caught with his finger in the tank.  “Breathtakingly immoral”, is how said prosecutors described Mr. Wyatt.
  13. A Funny Thing Happened To Me On The Way To America:  Not so long ago a group of Muslims – US citizens all – were returning from a conference in Toronto Canada when they were detained for hours by Customs, searched, fingerprinted and interrogated.   Because?  Because the Americans thought that the conference, Reviving the Islamic Spirit, was a terrorist planning session.
  14. Academics fought their way up a lost river of statistics deep into the underground immigrant jungle and can tell us definitively that undocs don’t use the American healthcare delivery system any more than anyone else – They, in point of fact, use it less.  All of which will no doubt put naysayers right in bed next to Cheney hooked up to a defibrillator…
  15. Six thousand people responded to a Wal-Mart employment notice in Cleveland.
  16. Benazir Bhutto and Nawaz Sharif responded to Pakistan’s frantic election notice seeking someone – anyone but Pervez Musharaf to run the country.
  17. Tens of thousands of people in the Hamas-controlled Gaza strip demonstrated against Bush’s showdown in Annapolis.  Otherwise known as just another Israeli muscle-flexing festival.  Bush was surprised to learn that Arab states don’t really want to talk about anything unless and until the Israeli/Palestinian situation is addressed.  Alas, the Bush administration has no idea what the issues actually are.  George was thinking the conference was going to be about Ehud Olmert’s Big One.
  18. The US military says it will recommend criminal charges against Bilal Hussein.  Hussein, of course, is the Associated Press photographer working in Anbar Province who was picked up by our brave soldier boys and girls.  He is accused of “infiltrating the A/P and being a…Wait for it… “terrorist media operative.”  Hussein was a member of a team that won the Pulitzer Prize for photojournalism two years ago.  (Idle speculation:  His real “crime” was taking pictures of what US forces did to the town of Fallujah…Just a guess…)
  19. Darfur’s rebel group, Justice and Equality Movement wants all Chinese people to clear out.  Everyone else, Okay.  But the Chinese have to go.  This only appears irrational if you don’t know how deep Chinese involvement in oil exploration is Darfur reaches.  The “peacekeepers” who got ejected?  They were army engineers….
  20. The Hugo Chavez-Alvaro Uribe spat is heating up. 
  21. Riots in France
  22. Riots in Bolivia.
  23. And Vladimir Putin accused Washington of plotting to undermine parliamentary elections in December.  The US response?  Of course we are!  But we objected to being accused of it just the same.

 

 

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